Writing

       I have never seen myself as a writer. I have longed to be someone who could write a novel: A Jennifer Weiner, a Jodi Picoult, a Glennon Doyle Melton or a Brene Brown. I am not them. I am only me. Of late, I have been digging deep to discover who I am. I have pushed myself away in hopes of becoming like someone else, that, in fact, I don't really know me. I'm working towards no longer apologizing for things that are not my fault. I'm working towards ceasing explaining myself, when an explanation isn't necessary. I'm working towards saying "no" without guilt. I'm working on not being embarrassed if I feel I have "more of something" than someone else. I worry so much that I may look like I'm gloating, that I reduce myself into such a small version of whatever I think I need to be so no one is offended. This, not feeling like I'm gloating, is quite challenging for me. 

       So starting now, when I feel the need/want to write, I will just write. I will not worry about being grammatically correct, nor, sounding intelligent. I am just going to write.